I found out I was pregnant the week after I wrote the post 'what can I do to stop him hurting'. We were due to help friends move house on the Saturday, so being due AF on the Friday, I tested Thursday and Friday just in case and they both came back negative. Didn't want to do myself a nasty while moving house you see.

Sunday morning rolls round and I lie in bed feeling very very sick. Still no AF. So I dig out the expensive test, saved to be used when I honestly thought that I would be pg, and tested. When it came back positive, I did a double-take. I was so used to getting the negative result that I almost didn't look at the test once I had used it.

Hubby was downstairs making breakfast. I wandered over to him, put my head on his shoulder and said that I didn't feel very well. He looks all concerned and asks 'what kind of not very well?' So I pull the test out of my dressing gown pocket and say 'this kind of not very well'. At which point we both burst into happy tears!

We got to church that morning, and told a couple of people. One of our friends (pregnant, due in April) cried when I told her, which set me off too. She had been praying for a baby for us ever since we lost our last one. It was fabulous to tell people, even though it was still very early days.

We also told both sets of parents that day. My folks who had seen me the day before had already guessed because 'there was something different about me', even though as far as I was concerned I wasn't pregnant due to the two negative tests I had already had! They were thrilled for us thought. Hubby's parents were a little more, shall we say, reserved. 'Oh. Was it planned?' 'I'm devastated that you are pregnant, I am not old enough to be a grandparent'. But happily, as time has moved on, Hubby's parents are happy about it now. Even wanting to tell people, which 4 weeks ago, they didn't want anyone to know.

As for me, I have been feeling nauseaous from the day before I found out I was pregnant. It got worse at 6 weeks, when crippling tiredness kicked in, but things seem to be abating a little now. Morning sickness is such a misnomer - its all day sickness with me! Physically I am filling out, but the girls at work assure me that you can't tell. I'm a bit paranoid about my increasing girth especially since I wear rather fitted clothes, but its only obvious to me, apparently.

God has been so faithful to us the last few weeks. I spent the first 2/3 weeks worrying that I would miscarry again, that I would have an ectopic and each Sunday, there were 'do not worry' verses put up on the big screen. Normally our church doesn't do that, have one verse that is put up on the screen at the beginning of the service, but for the first couple of weeks of the pregnancy, that is what happened. Verses about not worrying, and having peace. God certainly got my attention with that! I believe that he has given us his peace, something I am so grateful for.

I also then spent the rest of the time worrying that I would have a missed miscarriage, that we would go to the scan and my womb would be empty, or that there would be no heartbeat. But the scan on Monday, which dated me at 11 weeks exactly showed a wriggling little baby with a strong heartbeat, and I was so relieved. Relieved because I wouldn't have to go through the pain of losing a baby again. How selfish is that?!

So now I am beginning to connect with our baby. I connected with our last baby from the moment that we knew we were pregnant. And I think that God allowed or enabled or blessed us with that special connection so early on because he knew that we would only have 3 precious weeks together. But this baby, I have a lifetime (hopefully) to spend with him or her. And I can't wait to meet him or her in October!