We have a date...

We have a provisional date for me to come home full time... March 15th or thereabouts.

We were at a church service where Hubby and I were really challenged to trust God more, and after discussion, Hubby admitted (and to a certain extent I feel the same way) that my wage is our safety net, and that by keeping it, we are not trusting God to provide for our needs. Instead we are looking to ourselves to keep life ticking over and to achieve. So we decided that I should stop work in March as it says in the Word that wives should be keepers at home. I guess it also helps that Hubby has been promoted as well, which makes the loss of my wage easier to bear.

But now I feel really really weird. All I have wanted for the last 18 months/2 years is to be a wife at home, but now that it is going to happen, I feel really overwhelmed and think 'can I really make it work?' I mean, my one day at home and not working in the week is not enough, and I still get stressed out on Thursdays when I work from home, and not to mention my commute is now 2 hours a day, which really tires me out. I have very little energy in the evenings when I have been at work, and my bible study and prayer time have really suffered. So on those facts alone giving up work seems to be the solution.

Perhaps its just the devil having a little dig at me, making me doubt my convictions, make me doubt what God has so clearly laid down in the Bible. And when I voice these to Hubby, he just smiles and says 'its your decision', which makes it harder! I guess I need some encouragement that this is the right thing, even though I know deep down it is.

Comments

Renee said…
Hi Di,

I think it's great that you've got a date for when you'll stop work and come home. You have all the encouragement I can give you electronically.
ellen said…
How wonderful that you have a date for being home! I think with anything, even the things we really, really want or are convinced are the best, there are gains and losses. I think it's normal that now that the end of working is in sight, you'd start to grieve those losses and worry about if you'll really love being home like you thought you would. And you're right--the devil does love to make us question what the right thing is. I think it's wonderful that you want to stay home and be a good wife for your husband--it's what God has called you to, and I know He'll provide the strength and the means.